September 22, 2010

Pregnant dreams

Last night, I dreamed that I was pregnant.

I have had this dream once before, but this was different.  I was in our kitchen at home, talking to my mom.  We were talking about nothing in particular.  I felt my water break and realized that I was pregnant--I hadn't known before.  There was some discussion about how it was that I came to be pregnant--I didn't know.  I couldn't think who the father was, or even how it had happened.  I remember patting my belly, which was not taut the way pregnant bellies look with their hidden-basketball roundness, but rather much the way it normally looks (soft and squishy and nondescript).

The dream did not include birth, but suddenly I was presented with a tiny baby, purple-mauve with curled arms and legs and a scrunched-up face.  My whole body suffused with joy as I looked down at this infant cradled against my chest and I had the thought "skin on skin contact."  I thought it was a girl but then saw that it was a boy.

Next, I was at home again, in a La-Z-Boy recliner, like the blue cloth one we had when my brother was new.  My baby was fussing a little, and I held him and pushed out the recliner to tilt horizontally.  A vaguely defined male was standing over us and drew a blanket over me, tucking us in, and I curled up on my side in the chair around the baby.

I woke up curled in the same position and diffusely content, though a little weirded out.

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